060211 第一只我不怕的狗走了
以前它一吠我就跑得远远的，吃饭也不愿意把脚放地上，因为它总爱在饭桌徘徊。后来也许它老了，不再那么活跃，渐渐敢伸手触摸它，再慢慢地，喜欢把它抱在脚上抚摸。有时它站在椅子旁，我会随手抚摸它的头，一旦停下来它就把头凑更近，靠在我的脚、用很无辜的眼神撒娇，要我继续抚摸。因为它我开始不害怕和狗相处。虽然还会”视狗而定”，还是不喜欢让狗舔我的手，但已经”进步”很多了！
后来它病了，短短时间忽然变好瘦，我也没办法抱它，因为会让它无法呼吸。但还是会抚摸它的头，它依然会把头放我大腿旁撒娇。
我会想念那无辜的眼神，想念每个星期那短短和它玩的时间。现在它不用受苦了，到了更好的地方，希望以后有机会见到它，像小胖一样 
Rock 30
technically this is not a mayday concert but i feel it deserves the post-concert post as much as one =)
i was asked “who impressed u the most”. my ans was wawa! bcos she was so amazing – she’s aged – u can tell from her looks n figure – but her voice was so so good n i was amazed tt i actually knew her songs! esp 大雨. gosh i always sing 大雨就要開始不停地下 each time it looks like it’s gg to rain, n there i was listening to the original singer! she looks soooo qin qie too!
then the “asker” said her idol tarcy was the best. n i also agreed. haha. the last i saw her was probably when i was still in sec sch – n the SBS concerts in which u use bus tix to exchange for concert tix were still an annual affair. she’s SO CHIO. still looks v young! n her voice was SO STRONG. so beyond expectations!
then xin xiao qi was mentioned. n i agreed she was v good too. lol. in a nutshell, the veterans were really good. they really can sing! n i’d say rock happens to have a few of the best veterans around.
like emil chau. gosh, tt totally brought me back to the sbs concerts days. loved how the entire stadium sang along to almost all his songs.
the zzz parts were pan yue yun (sorry she’s really not my era n i really duno a single song she sang, altho obviously she has a good voice n the fact tt she was the FIRST singer rock signed made her very special), yu ke wei (eerie song to start with, nv say who she was after she intro her album, promo etc so we were trying to guess who she was, but i guess she can sing real well for a newbie), n sadly tho Kelly’s singing improved a lot, the songs she sang didn’t seem to resonate with the audience. oh n it was damn sad tt the audience treated the local singers’ segment (supposed to be ‘rock newbies’) as a toilet break. shows how supportive singaporeans r huh. (then again, given the number of non-sgreans on our soil now, perhaps they were not sgreans haha)
wu bai sang ALOT. i wish it was mayday tt sang tt much. heh. his rock is not my cup of tea. ;p
mayday. each time i see them perform it reaffirms my love for them. HAHA. so happy to see guai shou jumping ard (which means his toe dun hurt no more?) , masa playing like a madman, stone being cool-ly rock, n (my) ashin so shuai n seh, after 7 mths n 17 days. (KL concert was 5 June 2010) best of all, someone praised tt ashin sang well tonight – the first time she ever said tt he sings well. haha!
apart from the opening set with wu bai n zhang zhen yue, the 4 songs they sang during their own set were gong lang, zhi zu, wen rou n ren sheng hai hai. qt sad tt they didn’t sing the fast songs but i guess they left it to wu bai. thank u for gong lang tho. it’s like my zhu ti qu can. lol.
it was an amazing concert on many scales – kudos to the crew behind it. can imagine the logistical nightmares they must have had! it was the first time i saw 3 different top-notch bands on 1 stage at the same time, each with their own MI. damn cool!
and i’ll end off with a song tt came out when i was in pri 5 or 6. it was simply amazing to hear it sung live just now.
2010
2010，新的开始。从痛苦的第一个月，到渐渐适应。秘密：当学生说我比其他老师好的时候，有爽到~
2010，想要逃开，却更义无反顾。秘密：被爱的人需要，是一种幸福。
2010，吃了回头草。半年前大家的祝贺，到半年后的摇头反对，我庆幸有“大家”这些朋友。秘密：我败给10次云霄飞车。
2010，不会游泳的我学会了潜水。秘密：和10年前的偶像潜水，是蛮妙的感觉。
2010，去了梦寐以求的地方。秘密：去之前觉得一次就够了，但，我好想再回去。
2010，因为完成楼上的梦想，没在台北跨年。可以疯狂的不顾一切，但还是理智了。秘密：看着电视，好想哭！
2011，要更积极，对身边的人好一点，脾气好一点，学会独立一点。秘密：脾气那一点，应该很难。
again
can’t sleep again!
it’s christmas eve. hmm. there’s only 1 person i wanna get present for but tt’s also the hardest present to get. zzz.
looking forward to meeting up with frens on mon n tues, hoping wed’s work stuff can go smoothly n be over soon n then i’m gonna nua thurs n look forward to watching kua nian on fri.
kua nian. it feels strange to be home this time of the yr. feels strange to be still working. ah well.
n i’m still v dl with miss cb. i’ll keep recalling the incident when i’m on the bus n then my mind will be filled with all sorts of evil thoughts. n i wish i was in sch so she’ll at least get detention, not like at work where she just gets away with it. it’s like, u tell the HOD but nothing is done. in sch u just hv to tell ur ft n ur ft will stand up for u.
humans r so disgusting.
away
i can’t sleep and don’t want to sleep
so i uploaded the pics from maldives and muar/malacca, and basically relived the two hols all over again
i’ve been heading to taiwan every end of the yr since 07 and this is the first yr i’ll actually be in sg during christmas and new yr! kinda amazing! n of cos it’s all bcos i blew my funds on maldives ;p so altho i am very dui2 tt mayday is gonna perform 1 whole hour tis yr, i know i wouldn’t have given up on the maldives trip for the world.
snorkelled till the life jacket gave me abrasion bruises and till even my butt was sunburnt. lol. dived twice and had to do mask clearing during the check dive! but the place was so beautiful it kinda gave me courage. haha..
n i guess all the photos on fb speak for themselves!
the muar trip was sth i did not really treat as a “hol”. in fact i set off with RM18 – leftovers from duno when. day 1 we went to muar town after putting our stuff in eng’s uncle’s hse. just took in the sights and then went back to the hse for bbq dinner – sth i realised had been planned on fb but i totally didn’t register! was wondering y r we bbq-ing.. ha..
nxt day went to malacca without a proper itinerary. so based on instincts and the only gps-searchable-name “jonker street” we had, we managed to make it to the “correct” touristy place! lots of food and stuff to buy next to some historical sites. ate A LOT and walked so much we were so tired.. went back to muar where they brought us to this v ulu hidden place “oasis bay” for steamboat dinner! of cos, the best part was i finally “got through” to the youngest kid (there were 3 of them!) n he actually let me feed him for a while! haha
then we actually got to sing ktv!!! in muar!! so unbelievable. it was not very user friendly but the songs were rather updated. amazing. it felt weird to be singing sad songs then kids were screaming n running ard in the background. lol.
nxt day, which is this morning.. went to hv assam fish head n bak kut teh before gg to buy the famous muar otah then head back to sg.. short but good getaway thanks to our ability to self-entertain and self-irritate each other. haha..
and now.. 5 more days of work before shut down wk nxt wk. tho still gotta go back on wed. counting down to 12 noon on 7 Jan. tt’s when the much dreaded event will finally be over. n the thought of it just took all the happy feelings away. eeks!
OWD – bintan
the 4 dives passed in a blur. total dive time 157 mins. did mask removal twice, sibei panic on the second one but got over it. bottomline: survived and passed. i is a ow diver! next up: advanced. hmm.
i missed having my frens with me though it was really fun and all. it was just, there r some things tt can only be said to certain ppl n they were not ard.
i honestly didn’t mind the teasing abt d but sth was jus missing. i had a lot more thoughts swimming in my mind tt just could not be put into words cos they would have just been treated as silliness and well, just a joke. i mean, if u did not go thru the crazy days in 02 and 03 with me i dun expect u to understand my then-infatutation. haha.
dun get me wrong, i honestly enjoyed the 3 days. the stupid jokes, the massages, the mahjong (i actually won $$! amazing!) and the general lazing around. n of cos the watermelons on the dives. ah yes n the dives themselves. which i really dun rem much cos my mind was so full of stuff even when i’m 12m underwater.
it’s just… ya i had a lot on my mind. so much tt i woke up in the middle of the night to “type” my thoughts down on my iphone. sibei siao.
ok it’s time to put those thoughts in words. on msn.
熟悉又陌生的眼神。
history
when i start to waver and lose faith, i read the chat logs. the horrible feelings are still so fresh i still tear when i read the conversations. and it’s the tears welling up in the eyes that remind and reassure me that it’s correct.which is so very impt esp these days when all the stupidity and unhappiness makes me question myself.
so there i was dwelling in that lousy first week of jan when xy facebooked abt missing the class tho it was terrible. a whole string of comments followed, all familiar names and faces and of cos i just had to say they were not THAT bad. so, memories took another lane and made my heart feel confused.
2 ends of the see saw. i guess i do leave a part of my soul behind everywhere i go. once in a while i revisit it and try to find a whole new meaning to that phase in my life.
sweet stuff
seen on fb:
A real relationship: Has fights. Has trust. Has faith. Has tears. Has hurt. Has sweet smiles. Has genuine laughter. Has snorts because of the laughter. Has weird, stupid, unnecessary arguments. Has patience. Has communication. Has secrets. Has jealousy. And most importantly, love. This is all just a mess that turns out beautiful & an experience that can never be forgotten.
halloween
good food, good beer, good company
*likes
hatred
There is so much hatred in me right now I want to write directly to the biggest one. To inform him of all the misdeeds n unjust. It’s already the qing dynasty. I wan to be the one who overthrows the 昏庸、腐败的政府。everyone who’s been talking abt it, isn’t it time to rise up against the tyrants?
Someone tell them even ppl in the industry overseas r laughing at their stupidity. They hv created a whole new meaning to the word “bimbo” which is agreed to by the very ppl they think r their frens. Someone let them know, ppl so-called help them not truly willingly but bcos they hv their ulterior motives too. Someone tell them, no one cares abt u being on top, so dun use tt to throw ur own face.
I pray for the day all the ppl above have been waiting for to descend upon us soon. I pray tt ur fall from grace will finally alert the ones who matter to see ur misdeeds. Till then, I put my trust in God he’ll see to the unjust.
Amen.
happy tuesday
met up with marilyn.. i think we’ve not met for like more than a yr???
n it’s just a very happy feeling that the way we talk n all is still the same
big likes!!
n it’s all bcos of my previous blog post (points below). i smsed her abt the song n we arranged to meet!
and yep, finally we did.
been saying “meet up soon” for the longest time but the soon turned into a year!
tsk tsk
ok just wanted to blog down the happy feelings 
from this moment
years back marilyn “intro-ed” me to this song and we spent so much time gushing over it as the perfect wedding song
today, was helping eng search for songs for their photo montage and after countless song recommendations i suddenly thought of this! n with the help of whatsapp, i was able to express my excitement though she’s more than 6000km away down under. obviously silly eng has nv heard it before and i had to wait till she got home n googled it n got hong’s permission. n the good news was… if nothing goes wrong, it’ll be the main song of the montage video. *victory sign!*
i can’t wait for 11 Dec! i just hope i wun cry on stage haha.. then again, sj will be more than prepared to continue hosting without me cos i bet he foresees that i “sure cry one”. LOL.
looking forward =)
I just swear
That I’ll aways be there
I give anything
And everything
And I will always care
Through weakness and strength
Happiness and sorrow
For better, for worse
I will love you
With every beat of my heart
From this moment life has begun
From this moment you are the one
Right beside you is where I belong
From this moment on
From this moment, I have been blessed
I live only, for your happiness
And for your love, I give my last breath
From this moment on
I give my hand to you with all my heart
I can’t wait to live my life with you I can’t wait to start
You and I will never be apart
My dreams came true because of you
love that last line – my dreams came true because of you
ok i love every line la.
=) goodnight
sane no more
i tot we could slack a bit before the nxt big thing.
tot tt after this wed, things would be a bit slower.
i hate ppl who call for every single thing, big or small, urgent or otherwise.
no, my conclusion is, i dun like tis mall anymore.
i’m sick of it!
when i saw the “it’s confirmed on 9 and 10 oct” i was totally totally totally depressed
when i was very happy just 1 second before
it’ll pass.
that worked when i could see the end in sight.
when i thought after tis wed i’d only have that finale wkn.
n some break before the race thingy starts.
this thing just threw everything off balance simply cos there’s super a lot of logistics involved
ppl use months to come up with 1, n we hav to do it in less than 4 wks.
n bcos she can nv replace wy, n share the load the way wy did, i’m still alone
bah
i shouldnt be feeling this way
but maybe, i’ve kept certain grouses too long too deep
n it’s at these moments that they erupt in ways i can’t fathom
i’m only thankful to meano’s irritating antics tt make me smile/laugh like an idiot from time to time
pls dun take tt away from me
the tot of maldives doesnt make me smile anymore
cos there’s tt shit in the 1st wk of jan
i can foresee, it’s gonna be comparable to Hell. or, “the next worst thing” after hell.
it’ll pass.
ya right.
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